That tilling the ground is fruitless
Because God prefers dead animals?
Shall I suggest cattle ranching
For cows are bigger than sheep,
And this way you needn't compete.
Shall I council you, O Pharaoh,
To consider your slaves human
Because maltreatment breeds rebellion?
May I suggest giving them holidays
To satisfy them even in their chains
And ensure their master you remain.
Shall I advise you, O Prodigal Son,
To stop burning cash like a spendthrift
For the seers predict famine next year?
May I suggest you invest in water towers
To monopolize the market when it goes under
Thus safeguarding your future against hunger.
Shall I remind you, O Samaritan Woman,
That Israel's God disdains adultery,
And your love affairs have cost you his company?
May I suggest you curb your appetites
And return to the husband of your youth
Then maybe from God you'll hear gospel truth.
Shall I convince myself, O Heart of Mine,
That I advise in accordance with God's will
And that to keep silent would be sinful?
Shall I prove my goodness with truth telling
Or shut up, sit down, and seek the plot
He is unfurling even as we speak as we ought not.