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A Can't-Do Kind of Woman


When an employee is given too much to do, the quality of the work suffers. Either that or the employee loses his or her soul. They become a workaholic who doesn't know how to stop producing. They can mow people down to accomplish their tasks and have no time for anyone who doesn't work at their pace. They become a machine.

Isn't this the same with motherhood? If a mother tries to do too much, the quality of her work suffers. Either that or she loses her soul. And by doing too much I mean she tries to not only feed, dress, and provide shelter for her children, but she also tries to be countless other things: a therapist-mom, a financial counselor, an involved and concerned citizen, a baker, a party planner, an activity organizer, an artist, a fashionista, a seamstress, a cheerleader, a camping mom, an interior decorator, a slumber-party mom, a wedding-planner, an athlete, a doctor, a nutritionist, a hostess, etc. 

All these things are great! But we can't do them all. I realize this is rather un-American to say. After all, we can do whatever we set our minds too. Right? Well, usually yes, but like I mentioned before, we'd have to sell our souls to do so. And all these things aren't worth selling our souls.

I will never be a mom that plans big parties or cares very much about my children's clothes. It's just not in me. But I will fix the sink if it leaks and I will write poetry when the kids have quiet time. I'm a plumbing and poet kind of mom. That's my particular shade of motherhood. If I tried to be another kind of color, I would lose my particular hue. I would lose my soul. 

This is a relief not only for moms who feel like they can't do everything, but for anyone who is disappointed with how his or her own mom performed. Perhaps you wanted to have an explaining kind of mom, but you got a doing kind of mom. Maybe you wanted a feeling kind of mom, but you got an analytical kind of mom. Maybe you wanted a calm mom, but you got an exuberant mom. 

God made every mom to excel in something. And that something was designed, not to satisfy their kids desires, but to glorify God. So if your mom wasn't what you think you needed, it's probably because your mom wasn't made to satisfy your desires in the first place: desires for consolation, instruction, celebration, activity, beauty, and truth.

But we aren't left hanging. Christ can meet these desires.

And when our children complain that we don't do x, y, and z like the other moms, we can be consoled that we weren't meant to display God's glory like other moms. We can't be every color of the rainbow for them. We weren't meant to be. But we can be that unique hue God made us to be when we walk together with him, trusting him, relying on him, and giving him all our time, hopes, and desires. 

Now that I think of it, he is the only one who we can commit everything to and still keep our souls intact. In fact, when we give him all our time and desires and hopes, we might find that everything is possible after all.

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