What if Jesus Had Dysfunctional Parents?

If Jesus grew up with dysfunctional parents, would he still have been perfect? If his parents had shamed him about how he wasn't meeting their expectations, would he have developed certain complexes? If he had had to take care of himself from a young age or had parents who didn't convey unconditional love very well, would the world have lost its Savior?

What do we know about Jesus parents? We know that Jesus grew up in a Jewish home with imperfect parents. We know that his parents weren't clear about how he would save Israel. We know that Jesus had to learn things from his parents, such as how to dress himself and wash dishes and build a chair, but we also know the Holy Spirit taught him how to do the will of his Heavenly Father.

We know that since he had imperfect parents, there must've been some misunderstandings between them and probably some misplaced discipline. We know his family had to flee Bethlehem to Egypt for part of his early life, and that probably caused the family quite a lot of stress. We know his family was poor and probably wrestled with scarcity. We also know that he lost his father sometime before he was thirty and thus had to fill in that role. All these things hint that Jesus probably DID grow up in a dysfunctional family. 

By the way, by dysfunctional I don't mean parents who locked him in a closet for the first three years of his life or who regularly beat him to get out their anger. I just mean parents who, by today's standards, didn't do things very well.

So if Jesus did grow up with dysfunctional parents, how did he end up so perfect? 

Is it because he was God, and his deity somehow buffered him from picking up his parents bad habits? Is Jesus rather like a white sheep dropped into a blemished flock and couldn't change his fleece even if he'd wanted to? Or did Jesus actually come from the blemished flock? Was the blood coursing through Jesus' veins the same that coursed through Adam and Noah, Abraham and Judah and Tamar?

The Bible seems to say yes. In fact, the Bible seems to spend quite a lot of time tracing his family tree. The Bible is also quite clear about the generational sins that were passed down: Noah's drunkenness, Abraham's lying, David's lust, etc. I'm pretty sure impatience and greed and self-glorification were imbedded into Jesus' blood too. In fact, it seems like Jesus' family tree was poisoned up from the roots. All our families have been poisoned up from the roots actually.

And yet Jesus didn't sin. Did he have no passions of the flesh? Did his Divinity give him no taste for sin? Seems to me—and I'm no theologian—that if Jesus never had a desire to sin, then sin wasn't a temptation for him at all just like bungee jumping is no temptation for someone who hates heights.

I think Jesus' flesh desired sin, that sin was tempting to him, that he was tempted just like us. "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin." (Hebrews 4:15 NIV) 

And Hebrews 2:17-18 ESV tells us, "Therefore he (Jesus) had to be made like his brothers in every respect, so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. For because he himself suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted."

Did you catch that? Jesus suffered when he was tempted. How could temptation be painful without a desire for that temptation. I don't think it was any easier for Jesus to resist temptation than it is for us to resist temptation. In fact, because Jesus resisted his entire life, it was actually harder for him. When we give in to temptation, the immediate pain goes away, but Jesus endured that pain his entire life, the pain of saying no to quick relief, saying no to hiding when afraid, saying no to his own way, saying no to backbiting and snubbing and taking what he wanted.

Jesus chose to suffer rather than give in to temptation his entire life. He chose to go hungry rather than sell his birthright as God's only son for a bowl of lentil soup. 

What kind of child chooses to suffer rather than give in? One that wants God's will more than he wants to satisfy his flesh, one who believes God's ways are better. One that really trusts God will provide, protect, and love. One in constant relationship with God the Father. And here is where we differ from Christ.

Jesus never broke that connection with God. He was born into relationship with his Father, and he never turned his back on God even when God turned his back on him at the cross. We, on the other hand, were born out of a relationship with the Father. Our inability to resist evil doesn't come from our parents' dysfunction but our broken relationship with God. 

Perhaps our particular brand of sin is derived from our parents' habits and methods, and certainly some kinds of sin are more colorful or seemingly de-habilitating than others. But regardless, we were going to be sinful one way or another.

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