1) Trusting the Lord doesn't mean giving up something you want now so you can get something you want later: "Okay, Lord, I'll stop waiting for that guy to like me. . . you must have a better guy for me later."
There might be a better guy later, but giving up one guy only to start the hunt for a better one isn't trusting God. That's just transferring our hopes from one human to the next. Trusting the Lord means giving up our own ideas of what's best for us and finding that an ongoing relationship with God is what we need.
2) Taking up your cross and following Christ doesn't mean denying ourselves comforts: "I could afford air conditioning but if my life is too cushy here, there won't be any comforts left for Heaven. Besides, if I didn't experience some discomfort on earth, how shall I prove that I've sacrificed for God?"
We do not earn Heaven by denying ourselves comforts. We do not earn Heaven. Period. Christ has already earned it for us. We can point to the cross as proof that the sacrifice has already been made. And because of Christ's sacrifice, we don't have to fear that we haven't sacrificed enough. We're free to make choices without fear of God's wrath.
3) Considering others more important than yourself doesn't mean you can't advocate for your own opinions, desires, or needs: "Everyone else would like to have Christmas at Aunt Carol's, so I just need to get over it. I'll just have to pack up the children and gifts and drive all the way out there."
It might be best for the rest of the family to have Christmas at Aunt Carol's, but their needs don't delegitimize others. It might be best not to go. But when weighing what is more important—the togetherness of the family or one's own rest or peace or whatever—remember that Christ died so that we needn't feel guilty about making a decision. Through Christ, God already approves of us, so we needn't fear other's disapproval either. We have already been accepted by the only one whose opinions don't change with the seasons.
4) Denying yourself doesn't mean ignoring your own desires and wishes and needs. I can't write a quote for this one because those who ignore their own desires usually don't talk about them directly. The quotes would be something like, "Okay, we'll do it your way. That's what we usually do anyways." Or "I guess we can go. I don't really need to stay, I guess." Or "Sure, I can do that. I'm usually the one who does things around here."
Christ came and died to show us how all our needs, desires, and wants can be fulfilled in a relationship with God, and unless we confess just exactly what we want, we'll never realize how God meets those needs. Sacrificing our desires, bottling up our emotions, or ignoring our needs will only turn us into cynical, resentful people who have long forgotten how to feel or dream or savor life.
More on rebutting false beliefs: Answering the Lies & Answering the Lies II & The High Price of Doing Good
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