How the Enneagram Numbers Show They Care

 One: the Reformer

I show I care by trying to make the world a better place for others to live. I don't want others to get into trouble, so I try to keep them out of it . . . without trying to be obnoxious, of course. If someone already seems put together, I have a hard time knowing how to be part of their lives.

Two: the Helper

I show I care by absorbing what others feel. I really empathize and hurt for others. I then seek to help people feel better. If people don't seem to have any need for help, I have a hard time knowing who I'm supposed to be to them.

Three: the Achiever

I care for others by being friends with them, and I can be friends with just about anyone. I also like to shine the spotlight on them, make them feel special, highlighting all the things they do well. I can also do or make unique things for them that no one would find in a shop window. If people don't appreciate my attentions or my gifts, I'll try to show I care another way, another day. I'll never give up! 

Four: the Individualist

I show I care through individualized, unique, and thoughtful gifts or experiences. I demonstrate to others how deeply I know them through words and gifts full of meaning and with acute attention to detail. If people don't treasure my gifts to them, I add this wound to my long list of other wounds.

Five: the Observer

I show I care by seeking to understand you. I ask questions, analyze and study you. I research the things that you've spoken to me about, and I present my findings so that you might share in my discoveries. If people don't care to listen to my findings, I keep to myself. Why should I share anyways?

Six: the Loyalist

I show I care by really trusting others and taking what they say to heart. When people are in trouble, I am a source of practical wisdom for moving forward. In fact, I often show I care by predicting what might happen to you if you make those choices. I want you to know what you're getting yourself into. If people don't believe me or think I full of bad news or stop wanting to be around me, I feel some sacred trust has been breached. 

Seven: the Enthusiast

I show I care about others by inviting them into all my fun. I love plan exciting celebrations for others. The more the merrier. There's no such thing as too busy. If my excess makes people feel like they are one of the crowd in my life, I don't mind too much. There's always more I can add to fill that gap.

Eight: the Challenger

I show I care by jumping right in to difficult situations with others. I will make risky sacrifices to show others how to get out of their troubles. I can stare down people's fear and give them armor and courage to get through hard things. If people feel I've taken over, and they start griping about me, I feel betrayed. But no one is forcing me to keep betrayers in my life. I can easily get out.

Nine: the Peacemaker

I show I care by doing whatever needs to be done to make others feel comfortable and at ease. I will forget my own desires in order for others to have their way. I am up for any adventure and open to listen to any gripe. But if people take advantage of my placidity, I might have a temporary burst of stubborn unreasonableness.

More on why the Enneagram numbers: Won't Give, Might Evangelize, Didn't Listen to You, Hurry, Quarantine, Handle Icky Feelings, Won't Say These Things, Ask for Help, Cooperate, & The Gospel for Each Number.