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Hard Things For Enneagram Numbers to Say

Below are things that each Enneagram number probably finds hard to say. Conversely, these are things that would be good to practice saying.

One: the Reformer

"It's not perfect, but it's good enough."

"I'm really angry."

"I need your advice." 

"I can't do it correctly."

Two: the Helper

"I am desperate."

"I need your help."

"I have no idea how to help you."


Three: the Achiever

"That person doesn't like me."

"I failed at that."

"I can't do this."

"Your ideas are great as they are!"

Four: the Individualist

"I'll fall in with the others."

"My feelings are wrong and aren't helping me."

"I'm a sinner just like everyone else."

"Yeah, I'm a typical four."

Five: the Observer

"I was foolish."

"I won't be able to understand this."

"I've got plenty to spare."


Six: the Loyalist

"Any of those options is good!"

"Whatever happens, happens."

"I don't have to do it their way."

"I can trust my own judgement."

Seven: the Enthusiast

"I don't know what I'll do next."

"Things are pretty bad."

"Can you help me explore what's at the heart of this pain?"

"I'm sorry. That sounds really hard for you."

Eight: the Challenger

"I'm excited to see what you'll choose next!"

"Whatever you decide, I'm with you."

"You've hurt me."

"I submit to your decision."

Nine: the Peacemaker

"I disagree and here's why."

"I don't want that."

"I can't do it your way."

"There is a problem here and it's my responsibility to do something about it."


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