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Showing posts from June, 2021

Fred Taylor: The Pack Leader

Of late, I've been enjoying The Dog Whisperer with Cesar Milan. In it, Cesar visits various people's houses and helps them train their seemingly-out-of-control dogs rather quickly by showing the owners how to exert a calm dominate energy around their dogs. The result is a calm submissive pack. So I'm watching this show, and it suddenly dawns on me how much like parenting this is AND how much like a pack leader my dad was to us kids growing up.  Without a doubt, my dad exuded a here-we-go-follow-me kind of energy, and in the midst of his determined leadership, he created a home environment that was safe from the outside world. He did his darnest to protect us from financial fears by working hard at what I think must have been a boring job. I mean, who really dreams of selling insurance when they grow up? His hard work provided a home with working drains and roof without leaks, a private school education, and more than enough clothes and food for us kids.  He and my mom inten

The Right Place to be Sick

Where can a man be sick anymore? Where can he sneeze  And wipe his nose on his sleeve  If all the sick are sentenced indoors? Where can a man be ill these days?       Where can he turn green And heave the poison within If our goal is to evade his malaise? Where can a man be afraid in these parts?    Where can he speak out His symptoms and doubts If his thoughts threaten friends weak at heart?   Where can a man be a sinner anymore?     Where can he complain, Snivel, rage or be ashamed If all on this earth are thusly sore? Where have the desperate gone before now, Where blindness and sin Are not new to him And mistakes, faults, and tears he allows? Where have the hurt found relief in the past? Where did the blind fall And the sinners  all crawl To find answers to all they have asked?

What I Learned About Parenting From the Dog Whisperer

LESSON ONE: When a pack leader dies and no one steps up to take the vacant position, the surviving dog can fall into insecurity, anxiety, nervousness, fear and possessiveness. The dog learns to control its owners with her fear, doing a lot of dominate behavior. PARENT APPLICATION : When parents don't take the lead in the family—set clear expectations, boundaries, and discipline—, their children can feel insecure, anxious, nervous, afraid, and possessive. They feel the role of leader is vacant and they step into it, controlling their parents with their own fear or nervousness or anger. This could also be applicable to young ladies who grow up with a strong father and then marry a passive or insecure guy. LESSON TWO:  Dogs react to their owner's energy. New situations represent a positive or negative experience to the dog. The dog looks to the pack leader to understand what to think of these experiences. Owners often create their dog's bad behavior by feeling stressed or ten

Why God Didn't Create a World as Cool as the Movies

After seeing a really cool movie, or playing a super creative video game, I sometimes feel like earth is kind of boring? Take the Marvel world. Its super heroes are way cooler than earth's heroes. Don't you think? Why weren't we given super human strength to punch things great distances, lift cars with our red-swirly-forces, fly or breath in space? Take Star Trek or Avatar or Star Wars: why can't we travel to distant planets and discover other civilizations?  It sounds wrong to say, but is this earth really the best God could do? Do we really have to satisfy ourselves with the Grand Canyon and glaciers and volcanoes and electric cars? And if so, why can we create more interesting worlds in games and movies? Did God mean to make earth so much less exciting than the worlds we can imagine?  Here's how I've come to answer that: First, God is not threatened by our creativity, and in fact, he made us to create.  God has given us some basic tools—the chemical elements,

A Safe Place to Make Mistakes

It's okay to make mistakes. I don't expect perfection here. After all, you're a child, New to this body, To this position, To your growing freedoms. It's okay to make mistakes. This is a safe place. So stop fretting. I don't keep track Of the times you take To learn these lessons. Take seven. Take seventy-seven times. My patience won't expire. And if you can't believe it, Look around you because You're in good company— Mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, Grandparents, aunts, and uncles— Surrounding you with examples Of action without strife, Movement without fretting, Thought without neurosis, Healing without excuses. Do you see them in history? Do you recognize them? Learn to ride on their coattails, Live through their hope, Mimic their faith. They can even teach you to Stop worrying about your worrying. It's okay. This is a safe place To be a sinner. No scolding. No nagging. No condemnation. No shame. Your mistakes no longer decide How I see you.